How Low Can You Go? | National Apartment Association

How Low Can You Go?

I’ve had some pretty cool jobs and I’ve had some pretty bad jobs. All of them have been memorable.

Take, for example, the day I sunk to a new low while selling sandwiches in Ireland.

My typical sandwich route through a business park in Galway wasn’t bringing in the euros anymore and it was time to start soliciting anyone, lest I lose a free lunch every day.

Desperate to wear that incredibly feminine work uniform—fanny pack included—for a little longer, it was time to approach the owner of the adult entertainment shop nearby. I really didn’t want to have to go into a store already full of thighs and breasts and try to sell a chicken sandwich, but I had reached that low.

And so I entered the store, my basket full of unrefrigerated meats immediately getting tangled up in the beaded curtain that hung in the entryway.

This, I thought, is worse than last Monday when I went hood-less during a rainstorm, hoping the men at the hardware store would feel sorry for me and purchase a tuna wrap. Sure, I may have ended up in the hospital a few days later with a waterlogged lung, but I sold that tuna.

Unfortunately, this time wasn’t as successful. No sooner had I freed myself from the beads on the way in then I was tangled up again on the way out, the owner uninterested in anything I had to sell.

Some days just don’t turn out the way you planned—whether you’re a lowly sandwich girl or a professional in the apartment industry. But hopefully they’re memorable.

In the February issue of units, Senior Leasing Consultant Alicia Craig, NALP, recalls her most unforgettable community tours. Below are four:

1. “I was giving a property tour to an elderly woman who had lost her husband years ago,” Craig says. “At one point during the tour, she looked over and saw her high-school sweetheart, whom she hadn’t seen or spoken to in 50 years. The woman leased the apartment and eventually married her long lost love.”

2. “I hopped off the golf cart and my pants pocket got caught on a piece of metal. My pants ripped down to my knee and I had to hold them together while I finished the tour.”

3. “Years ago a lady came in to tour a one-bedroom. When I showed her the apartment, she sat down on the floor and began chanting “ommmmmmm.” She said she was doing so in order to “feel the energy” of the apartment. So, I sat down and went along with it. Fortunately, the spirits told her it was OK to lease.”

4. “I was in the golf cart going down our tour route with two prospects when I turned the corner and was face-to-face with a four-foot long alligator. The women screamed and the alligator began hissing before finally going back into the lake.”

Funny stuff, Alicia. Care to share more over a lukewarm turkey sandwich?

For Craig’s Top 10 list, check out End Points on page 96 in the February issue of units, which mailed Feb. 8. The e-version is available here.

If you’re interested in writing a “10 Things” column of your own, contact Lauren Boston at