APTly Spoken Blog

  • Don't Mess With These Gals

    After lone-wolfing it my first semester of college and frequently wandering by myself, I decided to take a self-defense class. My brother told me I had the weakest punch of anyone he’d ever met in his life, and while I disagreed with this wholeheartedly, I figured some technical instruction couldn’t hurt. For the next eight Thursdays, I walked to the student center and listened closely as a...
  • What Does the Silver Fox Say?

    I might block my uncle on Facebook.  He joined three weeks ago and has since commented on nearly every status I write. And we’re talking three- to four-sentence comments. On Thanksgiving, for example, I wrote, “I have a headache and I feel sick. Like ya do, Thanksgiving.” Minutes later and four ‘likes’ deep, my uncle wrote, “I don’t understand—are people ‘liking’ the fact that you have a headache...
  • Even Tough Guys Like Trophies

    My mom has a habit of trying to surprise me with good news by leaving voicemails that sound anything but. “Lauren, call me when you get this” is a personal favorite. She left that voicemail a few years ago, her tone foreboding. Now, if I were a TV daughter, I would have been Full House’s D.J. Tanner—damn near perfect (minus the time she accidentally fell asleep on her boyfriend’s shoulder)—yet I...
  • Remember (We Lost) the Alamo

    I made my first trip to Texas a few years ago. I was in Dallas for a conference and my roommate met me afterward for a little road trip.  After passing what seemed like 15 different dead animals on the side of the highway—I swear I saw an ocelot among the roadkill—Steph and I arrived in San Antonio. First order of business: margaritas and Mexican goods. We made our way to a tourist haven on the...

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