APTly Spoken Blog

  • I Want My HGTV

    I once spent 10 hours watching an “America’s Next Top Model” marathon on TV. I don’t even particularly like the show, yet I devoted the time it takes some women to give birth to such an endeavor. Binge-watching TV shows is one of my vices. I just find something so deeply satisfying about watching episode after episode without waiting until the following week. Conversely, I seem to find necessary...
  • Shop With Style (And In My Case, Stupidity)

    Four of my best friends from New York City came to visit recently. As we all got ready for brunch on the first morning, I showed them where the towels were and then carefully explained how to use the hair dryer. “The plastic piece that you use to turn it off and on broke last year, so you have to use this tiny metal screw,” I said, demonstrating how to properly stick said screw into the hair...
  • May the Odds Be Ever in Your Favor

    There’s no doubt I would be the Peeta of the Hunger Games. I faint whenever I see blood, I have a fear of getting stung by a swarm of bees—let alone tracker jackers—after seeing “My Girl” and I would most definitely try to force a romantic moment with my crush while trapped in a cave together. How could you not?! I wish I were Katniss, with her awesome hair braid and killer archery skills and 2...
  • Je Ne Speak Francais

    The first day of my high school French II class, the teacher turned to me and said, “Comment allez-vous?” (Translation: How are you?) “J’em appelle Lauren,” I replied. (Translation: My name is Lauren.) The teacher seemed confused—most likely because I couldn’t understand the most basic French after a full year—and shook her head. “Comment allez-vous?” she repeated. “J’EM APPELLE LAUREN.” Cue...

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