Friday, September 28, 2012
My parents had it easy—a fact I like to remind them of as often as possible.
You see, my brother and I were not your typical adolescents. We didn’t drink, we didn’t skip class, we didn’t go around town wreaking havoc upon unsuspecting elderly neighbors. In fact, it’s safe to say we were the world’s best—and, according our more popular peers, boring—teenagers. Thus, having a fake ID never even...
Thursday, September 13, 2012
One of the best things about my apartment is its proximity to the things that mean the most to me in life—namely, a grocery store within running distance where I can stop by for some free samples of cheese and pie after a strenuous jog and a Redbox where I can rent “Think Like a Man” for $1.27 (which turns into $5 when I forget to return it for four days). And let’s not forget McDonald’s,...
Thursday, September 6, 2012
It’s September 6 and I still don’t have a Halloween costume. I’m entering panic mode.
You see, I really enjoy dressing up each year, and put a great deal of time, effort, and money into pulling off the perfect costume. Unfortunately, this means I’ve set the bar very high.
Last year, for example, I had two costumes. For the first—unveiled in New York City the weekend of Halloween—I was the...
Thursday, August 30, 2012
The most exciting part about getting a school locker was decorating the inside. It was your chance to say, “Hey world—this is me.”
In middle school, “me” was someone who loved Jonathan Taylor Thomas. J.T.T. was adorable, but he also had an edge. He was the only intelligent son on “Home Improvement” and had the voice of an angel on “The Lion King” soundtrack. Homeboy’s got pipes.
J.T.T. was, in...