APTly Spoken Blog

  • If Residents Are Re-Enacting Scenes From “Titanic,” Consider Heating Your Pool

    I always loved swimming in my grandma’s pool in Maryland, but the water was absolutely freezing. It wasn’t exactly Titanic cold, but if Rose were there, I would have put up a good fight for that piece of wood she hogged while Jack froze to death. Needless to say, I was never in any rush to dive into the water. Then one day, after pacing around the deck of the pool for several minutes, I decided...
  • We’re Onto Your Game, Mona Lisa

    When a picture of an apartment community that’s advertised on the Internet is blurry or taken from far away, I don’t assume a poorly trained photographer is to blame. I assume this is a place, if seen in person, that would haunt my dreams. Coincidentally, the same logic can be applied to online dating profiles. To improve your community’s image, hire a good photographer who will take stunning,...
  • Greedy Employee v. Disgruntled HR: The Case of the Missing Orange Juice

    When the weather is nice, I like to jog one mile to an upscale grocery store near my apartment, indulge in a few samples of cheese, bread and cookies as fellow shoppers watch my sweat collect on the tile floor, and then run back home. Clearly, my love for free things knows very few bounds. Unfortunately, the same can be said for my ex co-worker. In addition to the typical coffee and tea...
  • Yup, Me and Jewel (the country singer) Could Do Our Laundry Together

    Whenever America’s favorite snaggle-toothed singer, Jewel, talks about her past life as a homeless person living out of her car, I picture her in an environment very similar to that of my 1996 Jeep. A co-worker who will remain nameless (Michelle) once likened the contents of my car to something you would see on Hoarders. While I respectfully disagree, I will admit I could survive quite...

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