Wednesday, December 28, 2011
My family doesn’t have the best phone etiquette.
As a child, I was so petrified of calling people that I would write out exactly what I wanted to say ahead of time and recite my lines repeatedly before dialing. Once I was finally confident enough to ad lib, my mother saw fit to secretly listen in on my conversations. One night, when there was apparently nothing good on TV, I could hear her and...
Thursday, December 22, 2011
It’s that time of year again.
Time to gather the family around the proverbial Yule log before mocking that 14-page holiday letter you get every year from those family “friends” you can’t stand. Time to watch your mother have a meltdown when she realizes the mashed potatoes she made for the Christmas party are the consistency of paste. Time to repeatedly tell your family members that you would...
Friday, December 16, 2011
The summer before my junior year of college, my family went on a cruise to the Virgin Islands. Each day on the boat, while the other passengers my age were flirting by the pool or trying to sneak into the casino, I was playing Bingo with the senior crowd.
You see, Bingo is a sport I’ve always enjoyed. It’s competitive, it requires skill and it’s not for the faint of heart—all things that I love...
Friday, December 9, 2011
One night when I was waitressing I asked an older male customer if he wanted dessert. He winked and said, “yes, how about your number?” I informed him we were all out of that.
The three months I spent as a server at my local pizzeria gave me a newfound respect for everything waiters and waitresses have to put up with on a daily basis. From the 19-year-old dish washer in the back of the kitchen...