APTly Spoken Blog

  • Whistle While You Work—And Doodle and Make Tin-Foil Flowers, Too

    I don’t want to brag, but I was the belle of the ball at my hometown pizzeria in suburban Maryland. During my three months there as a waitress, a few of the dish washers had a bit of a crush on me. I always had bread crumbs in my hair and permanently smelled like garlic, so this doesn’t surprise me. Of all my prospective suitors, Lucio was my favorite. He spent a good portion of his time making...
  • Would You Like Fries (and a Trash Can) With That?

    Several years ago my Mom and I were each enjoying a McDonalds ice cream cone from the comfort of our Windstar mini-van when a car full of teenage boys pulled up next to us in the parking lot. A few moments later, the guy in the passenger seat rolled down his window and threw an empty cheeseburger container on the ground. “Excuse me,” Mom immediately said, pointing to the ground, “but I think...
  • Honey Boo Boo Child Goes Broke In England

    England and the United States, in the scheme of all things international, don’t appear to be that different from one another. We all speak English, after all. And yet, upon arriving in Bath during my junior year of college to study abroad for the semester, it was obvious I was outside of my cultural comfort zone. Consider, for example, the first time I ate at a British McDonalds and went to...
  • Tis’ the Season to Be Inappropriate

    A holiday party is a hot mess. Whether it’s a gathering with friends or family, such celebrations seem to involve more beer than cheer; more inappropriate passes than clinked glasses. The single guys and gals become painfully aware of just how alone they truly are—and, if you’re me, search the premises for a sprig of mistletoe, the likes of which apparently only exists in Sandra Bullock movies...

Pages

Subscribe to Blog Posts