APTly Spoken Blog

  • It's A Bird...It's A Plane...It's A Cicada!

      Back in summer 2004, freakish insects as big as a gerbil (give or take) and as loud as a Kardashian were slamming against the windshield of my Mom’s minivan as we headed to my high school graduation.  In the years prior, my parents had already begun worrying about how they would throw an outdoor graduation party while these ominous pests, known as cicadas, were treating our backyard like their...
  • Don't Cry At Work (And Other Lessons)

    I have very few complaints about my first job out of college. But if I had to do it all again, I wish someone had given me the following advice: 1. Find an office with more men. If you’re looking to kill two birds with one stone—earning your keep in society while also meeting someone who will pay for your movie tickets—you should probably count up the number of men at your prospective place of...
  • Permission To Take Off

    When I was working at a large retail store one summer during college (think red bull’s-eye), one of my supervisors told me everything from her pants size (12) to the dirty details of her messy divorce. Apparently I have a face that says, “tell me everything.”  “Susan,” on the other hand, had an ex-husband whose face said “don’t tell me anything.” While I knew her entire life history, Susan knew...
  • My Pants Are On Fire

    I’m a horrible liar. It’s not so much that I have a problem with the lie itself, but it’s the post-lie paranoia that really destroys me. I was a ridiculously good child/teenager—seriously Mom, you had it so good—but the worst lie I can think of occurred about six years ago. I was 20, had just gotten my license a month prior and wanted to drive from Maryland to Connecticut to visit my friend. I...

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