Thursday, June 12, 2014
My Dad has been a teacher for over 35 years. Take a minute and think about just how many annoying high schoolers that shakes out to be. It’s, like, a million.
Growing up I considered following suit, turning the shaping of young minds into a family business of sorts. And then I grew up a little more and realized that, truth be told, I don’t really care for teenagers. Nor do I care for grading...
Thursday, June 5, 2014
Here are some things I never need to see on Instagram ever again. Like, ever.
1. The meal your significant other cooked for you. As if I’m not already hyper-aware that I am standing over the kitchen sink, alone, eating a can of tuna—the only thing distinguishing me from a cat being that I am fully upright—now I have to see a filtered snapshot of the mushroom risotto your boo made. (It’s always...
Thursday, May 29, 2014
I, like most kids, was obsessed with the ice cream truck. Whenever my brother and I heard that classic melody nearby, we’d run upstairs and grab a handful of coins from our Dad’s dresser. Technically stealing, but I see it as borrowing. And I’ve repaid him in blog mentions, so we’re even.
The ice cream was obviously a high point, but I was also in love with this gum you could buy that had a...
Thursday, May 22, 2014
I was taught to never judge a book by its cover. I was also taught that the customer is always right and if a boy makes fun of you, he likes you.
A lot of lies straight to my face.
If a customer is clipping her elderly husband’s fingernails while you are taking their food order at a pizzeria, they are not right. And news flash, when a boy ties part of your jacket to your desk so that when you get...